I am
a thousand lies
a million moves
a billion mistakes
all rolled into...
A person

I am
ten quick glances
twenty brave steps
thirty fearful looks
forty weak smiles
fifty long sleeves
sixty lies of 'I'm just cold'
seventy heartbreaks (another may end me)
eighty fake smiles
ninety lies of 'I'm fine'

I am
ninety suicide notes
eighty pill bottles
seventy bottles of bleach
sixty attempts on suicide
fifty letters of 'I'm sorry'
fourty cuts upon my wrists
thirty cuts upon my legs
twenty close calls with death
ten reasons for pain
nine mistakes in life
eight reasons why
seven dreams away
six sleepless nights
five unseen jokes
four hated reasons
three secrets bleeding
two days without eating
one more breath
zero more days
I am, numbers