I've slept for two days minus some hours I went out to buy cat food Today I went to the pool in the rain, and chugged along back and forth out of breath, encased in a partial wetsuit, watching the water steam at times, and then glitter, with bright designs as the sun came out for a moment And I return home to a monumental mess. Somehow it just didn't matter, this mess as I struggled at work, fighting a lame diagnosis that "you are just too anxious for this job because you get nervous before evaluations" from a man easily as anxious as I am, but much less aware of it The work rained down on me like a waterfall, and I couldn't stay dry Weekends gave way to endless work sessions and some sleep Suddenly, as if for the first time, I see how much paper is strewn on the floor, arranged by cats who inhabit this place far more than I do. The piles of unsorted things I would "get to on vacation" are now there, waiting to be gotten to. It's clear I am one who values work above housekeeping and the happiness of the little creatures who inhabit my world before order. And that's just fine with me.