Ok, ready set go/
I'ma pull this trigger and let my mind explode/
Like a painted car crash that's about to unfold/
These thoughts are told/
Uncontrolled/
Covering these wall like the number twenty three/
Explaining my insanity/
Its the soul carried in me/
This pens writing being the key to unlocking it's locked chest behind my chest/
Tightening without rest to protect what's left/
If only they would try to understand/
That someday's I'm not always alright/
Specially when I'm to tired to fight/
So I'ma give into this depression/
Despite complication/
Hoping to find some satisfaction/
Be it wrong or right/
So I can lay down tonight/
Even if it is on this bed of rhymes/
So many times I've asked why/
Maybe this time I'll be able to bring to light/
What's been missing so long from sight/
So I won't always seem like I'm so impolite/
Late nights alone wanting to die/
When no ones there to answer me/
So I often scream trapped in this misery/
**** chivalry/
I'm worn out and lost/
Tired of my kids always paying the cost/
Why I'm so angry and *******/
Sick of doing the things I'm told I need to do/
Just so I can give my family something new/
Other then a new room to stay in each time we're having to move/
Because I can't talk to people about what it is I'm doing when I"m up till two/
Looking in this mirror I just wish you people knew/
What it is I really do thanks to you/
I'm grateful for all they've given my family/
Why can't they see that when they talk to me/
Maybe after this rhyme I write from my knees/
The clock flashing three/
They'll finally know I'm serious when i say/
I'm sorry/
I'm honestly trying/
Inside I'm dying/
I wish I was lying/
But it's hard to when I'm always crying/
Begging for understanding when I'm hiding/
Silently I'm signing/
This writing is what I'm feeling/
Help is what I'm needing/
Something other then misleading readings/
Cause for the first time this is me truly pleading/
This Colt.45 is problem deleting/
For the desperate human being/
Tired of these eyes bleeding/
No meaning/