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Oct 2018
Every night I'm sitting here getting high trying to feel alright\

But every night your not here is another fight\

Struggling inside with this evil version of myself\

Most of the time feeling like around my throat is a belt\

And it's only letting up when I take this lighter to the melt\

So I melt\

Every time the crying I felt\

Running down my face onto the paper I spent my last pen on\

Losing my self in this smoke and this song\

I know when I look in the mirrior this is wrong\

But its been like this for so many years now I'm already to far gone\

For any reason from anyone or myself to belong\

Anywhere in this version of what shouldn't be done\

So I melt\

The only family bond I have at the end of this\

Don't remember what it is to be sober so those days I can't miss\

What todays date\

Last I checked it was December 5th\

Got the day marked here on my wrist\

So I melt\

Waiting for the phone to answer saying I have help\

Treatment for this ******* life I've been dealt\

Someday I'm sure it will be on its way\

But today I'm just gonna have spend it feeling ok\

All the faces I'm faced with begin ta fade\

No lie this is the truth of my pain\

So I melt\

It's no secret myself I hate\

I know theres others that can relate\

Finding yourself pushing over and over that button to delete\

Wishing to take back some words you never meant to speak\

Spending the next week hiding under the bed sheets\

Wondering what it would take for some moment to personally keep\

Why I'm up getting high all night\

Praying never to see that sun light\

So l melt\

Just trying to be like everyone else I see\

Smoking this while I write to just feel alright\

Cause honestly\

Yesterday I went and got treatment\

Any moment now could be my last week\

Spending it trying to feel alright\

An just in case tonight is my last night\

I'ma get high while I got this light to the melt\

So I melt\
Diction
Written by
Diction  27/M
(27/M)   
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