She hits the bottle
like she’s playing blackjack
Always wanting more
And inevitably losing it all
She stands in the remains
Of the destruction she’s caused
Filled with regret
Finding salvation
At the bottom of a glass
Coming home jubilant
To speak of all her successes
And all I hear is a buzz
The slurs in her speech
And lose sight of all else
Hearing loosely threaded stories
From that point on
Trying to find the holes
Where the honesty shines through
Knowing she’s far too happy
To be telling the truth
Filled with self loathing
Reeking of liquid courage
Losing her grip on what lies
She’s told before
She loops
And falters
At which point
I close my ears and walk away
Not wishing to waste my time
On tall tales and a tossup
No matter which side the coin lands
I’ve lost myself
In this battle with your illness