don't bother to hold me hair.
and dammit why do I feel the need to lock you out,
I don't want to have to share.
I don't.
I have carried you on my back,
trying to help you,
and now I am empty and I can't focus on your pain
like you want me to,
I'm empty and I feel the harsh brush of bitterness climbing up my throat,
to form the acid on my tongue,
and I bite it back,
but my insides rage war,
And I love you.
we've been through,
death,
divorce,
rape,
sex,
Sarah,
but I'm...
barely breathing,
and I'm not sure you're seeing me anymore,
this breath is waning and I can't focus on you,
any more
or maybe it's so hard to past the news feeds of your life,
I resent that I have to ask you, to care about me,
I thought you know me,
but maybe you know the "me",
I used to be.
and can I just say whats on my heart,
I wish I didn't have to teach you how to love me,
you get me on so many many levels,
but jump back to the basics,
I dont want to be the supply and demand of my own needs,
You say you've never felt more closer but I'm not sure if you know I breathe.
I want more from you then this, how many times have a put your needs before mine,
And I can't do it this time,
and find love,
in life's leeches,
thinking I'd be the cure,
and have sat and rage war beside you,
but my insides hide,
you're hurting me cuffing my wrist chaffing this heart
and I'd burn this if it didn't help the bleeding of my heart
i'm sorry all I want is for you to be
happy but all i see is the water now that surrounds me,
I jumped in to save you,
but I have,
and I didn't save a vest for me.
were just drowning together no one better off then before,
but i no longer want to commiserate together, though I'm in love with the storm.