It's the next day and I'm feeling sick with guilt,
It happened and there's nothing I can do about it,
I hurt the most amazing man in my life,the love of my life,
He can't eat ,
He can't sleep,
He tells me he's hurt but he loves me,

I want him to hurt me back.

I sit there and try to make myself upset,
Try to harm myself mentally,
What I done was wrong,
I need a punishment...
A big one.

I want him to cheat on me.

"Do it", I tell him,
"I want you to make me feel the pain you did,
Just once.
I want to feel hurt just like you did,
Make me suffer,
Do it and I can move on."

I want him to make me feel worthless.

"I'm a lying cheat,
And there's nothing I can do about it,
And it kills me,
People say...
'Once a cheat,always a cheat.'
But I know that's not the case."

Baby, I'm sorry.

"I'm sorry,it's all that I can say,you mean so much and I'd fix all that I've done if I could
Start again,I'd throw it all away to the shadows of regrets and you would have the best of me."