I've always been afraid
of spiders,
for instance,
of the dark
of

But I've never been consumed
by this kind of fear
that opens a black hole.
Tears apart my limbs,
rips skin from skin
creating perilous fractures
that let the life escape from me.

My bones are shaking,
they're cold.

This kind of terror
when you
callously mocked
the
"hopeless romantic"
saying that you
never should let
romance control
life decisions,

And it's so quiet now,
but I wanted to believe
you would do
something stupid for me

as I would do the stupidest things
for you.