There is no music here
Where I stay
Inside my mind
Locked behind the disturbances
That shake me
Quaking my bones until they come loose
Covered by despair like Pompey
Its silhouette immortalized
Against the back drop of my ongoing torment.

This depression a lingering installation
Stuck in neutral
  Neither here
Nor there
           Or right now
Living on Auto pilot
The inner structure of my mind in chaos.

While my feet plant themselves forward
Driven the upbeat staccato of footfall-pavement
The hooked-heel motivation of basic life maintenance.

I have rotted
I have lost
I have given the whole of myself
And still watched him walk away
Not goodbye forever
But goodbye for right now
Sounding just as permanent.

My body is tired
My mind is numb
I have given everything I am
To an idea
To a promise
And kept just enough to function

But I am tired now
Being half of something
Missing vital limbs
Toes
And fingers
So exhausted with life
Exhausted with myself

That right now all I wish to do is sleep,
And maybe
Just maybe I'll never wake to this hell again.