you broke my heart.
no, you ******* ruined it.
to the point where the inner workings of my heart screamed for change instead of for you.
it took me months to pull wires and plug them in other sockets, hoping that it would set all my feelings for you on fire and burn them to a crisp because i couldn’t feel like that.
not anymore.
it took me an entire night to lace up my running shoes and by the time it was done, i was so numb that running felt like standing perfectly still.
so i ran and i ran and i ran. until i bumped into him.
and he seemed compassionate and gentle. not the way you were, but in a different way; a better way because it wasn’t you.
and now here i am, miles down the road and i’m in love with this person that isn’t you at all.
and some day i will marry him and it will break your heart the same way you broke mine.
but we will remain friends because my running shoes will come untied from time to time and you’ll catch up with me. because you’ve realized what you lost.
you’ll still make sure that i care and i’ll remind you that the only thing i ran from was your empty promises and thoughtless betrayal.
but i won’t stop for long, because each time i stumble and tie my laces, i get faster. not because i want to run but because i want to forget you in the least painful way possible.
i’m in love now, and some day i’ll set my running shoes on the shelf and you won’t be chasing after me anymore. the only thing i’ll have are the polaroids i took the night i realized you were my best friends, but for some reason the only image i can see clearly is the one where you and i don’t ever end up together the way we both thought we were supposed to.
and ten years down the road when i’m marrying this love of my life, i will remember the way you made me smile at one point, and when i kiss him, i will forget you ever existed and i’m so sorry for that.