I'm a stupid girl. I hate it. I hate my brain and my heart and they love ******* with me at this hour. Im good at pretending, my poker face is a masterpiece. You probably dont know the extent of my feelings and it boggles my mind because these emotions are so intense that I can physically feel the energy overflowing when I'm around you. Every time you look into my eyes I swear you can see it, maybe you're just a boy and you don't pick it up, or maybe I'm right and you're so intuitive that you know but you just don't reciprocate. Or you don't want to ruin the relationship we've built because you've gone through enough heartache and you don't want to feel that way again. I just want to love you but the ****** up thing is that i want you to be happy even more. I've never felt this and it ******* scares me, am I capable of loving you from afar? I don't know how long I can keep this up. Your best friend told me that you're getting over your feelings for your last girl, he said you want to take a year long break from non platonic relationships. Am I enough for you? Can I get you to open up to me? To love me? Am I being selfish? ****. I should go to sleep.