Struggle struggle
Push push
Elbows out
Fresh air meets raw skin and pulls away

Hands creep out and crawl around
The edges of this cocoon
Wanting, testing
Hoping to break free from this protective prison

But the shell is so hard and I am so soft
And there is only me here
And the thought of eating my way out
Makes me feel full

So I write the pieces of my room down
Removing them
Fragments at a time
From my fortress
Like bricks

They weigh more than imagined
But are manageable
One at a time
I try not to let whole walls topple
Stretched somewhat thin
Back against one side
Legs against the other
Arms up high
To protect my head
Keep the roof from falling in

Depending on my position
Sometimes the sun punctures my gloom
Brightly dousing me in dancing-spirit
Drying out areas of damp
So that I can dust a little deeper

Mostly though there’s a surrounding light
That seems to be getting whiter
Comes from a place inside the egg that I occupy

The rain gets in
Through the cracks that I’ve created
And when it stings
I know that I can cover up these progresses I’ve made
Try to pretend they were never there
So that I won’t feel their growing pain

Or

I can explore the exposed emotions
Try to fix the fears they have set free
Constantly changing my devotions
Nurture the parts of me that need attention
Carefully attend to my wounds while giving voice
And stage
To the more confident areas of my expertise

Sometimes I’m in agony
Screaming not so silently
Ripping at the places that are roaring
To be listened to

My skin
Inflamed and broken
Bears you witness
If you know how to note the evidence

And you can only know
What I am prepared to show
My anger
Exploding through my pores