I thought it was nothing when we first met
I knew it was just ***
The first time,I Felt like it’s going to be easy
We agreed it was going to be a fling
Weeks later,I couldn’t recognise myself anymore
I wasn’t the same anymore
I felt more emotions, cried alot
It started to get to me,so much that it took control over me
It controlled how I feel,how I act,how I feed
It had me wrapped  up and squeezed in its little palms.
I tried to escape from it,but I kept crawling back
I couldn’t talk to anyone,so I Googled
You don’t want to know the keywords for the search..
But every result gave me a falling in love narrative,
I didn’t want to fall in love, I just wanted ***
I didn’t want to be attached,I just wanted the attention
I didn’t want a relationship,I just just wanted company
I didn’t want commitment,I just just just needed a one time every time
“How did I get here” I asked myself everytime I was in the shower
Or when the thought of you popped  up
I’d fallen madly for you
Deep down, I knew it was  billshit
Deep down,I knew if I told you,you would laugh so hard
So I wallow in my pain,trying to pull out,
I hope i take it down sooner before it takes me down!