Jun 2018
Some nights i find myself looking for truth. In books, in motion pictures, in my own creations only to come out empty handed. Those nights I carry myself onto familiar childhood grounds. I lay on top of the ***** concrete rooftop and just stare.
Five levels off solid concrete pavement and I feel like I flew to space.
At first as I lay onto my back and look up at the clear night sky I barely notice a handful of stars, those that are the brightest and closest. But as time passes tiny bright dots start to dance underneath my vision, almost like an illusion. Only not quite so. Each star, no matter the brightness and illusion behind it was truer than anything I've ever known.
Five minutes... Stars farther than imaginable distance start to appear.
Fifteen minutes... Some stars start to jump around.
Twenty-five... I start seeing myself running with them.
The soft breeze keeps me grounded on the rooftop but my head it's up there and everywhere.
Starlight drowns out all. I fall in love on repeat with this earth shattering illusion of permanence.
Just think about it, the daughters of the universe always flaring up, caving in and going out. But from here, from the top of my parents apartment I can pretend. I can pretend that lives last. That suffering exists not. That gods and goddesses come and go just like mortals do
Ignite, flash, and fade.
I can pretend that my truth is what matters, that magic exists and suffering exists not.
The truth behind stars is not the illusion of permanence and lightness and awe it grants me in those fifty minutes of rooftop existence. It's the power and energy it provides me to carry out my days until the next time we meet again.
That does not mean to pretend that the existence of something is, means in reality it exists not.
For one, magic exists and no one can and should doubt it.
For when there are rainbows and wildflowers, caterpillars transforming to creatures with patterned wings, the music of the heavy rain and the silence of the night sky who can doubt the magic that holds every thread on this planet together?
Anyone who has ever smiled, dreamt, felt, loved, laughed has been touched by this magic
and i know that this is the truth!
The stars only remind me of this through their own illusion of permanence. They remind me I'm not alone, that I'm always being watched.
North star and company...
Do you gaze back at me as I gaze at you?
Do you shed the same tears I shed for the beauty that beholds you?How many of you ancient fires were the last breath of sun to a collection of planets?
If all were to die out and collapse, how long until we realize how alone we are?
How long until we realize oh daughters of the universe that the cosmos is within us, within all of us.
For I believe when come to understand this equality, love will conquer all
and peace will not be an illusion
but true permanence.
Five levels off solid concrete pavement and I feel like I flew to space.
At first as I lay onto my back and look up at the clear night sky I barely notice a handful of stars, those that are the brightest and closest. But as time passes tiny bright dots start to dance underneath my vision, almost like an illusion. Only not quite so. Each star, no matter the brightness and illusion behind it was truer than anything I've ever known.
Five minutes... Stars farther than imaginable distance start to appear.
Fifteen minutes... Some stars start to jump around.
Twenty-five... I start seeing myself running with them.
The soft breeze keeps me grounded on the rooftop but my head it's up there and everywhere.
Starlight drowns out all. I fall in love on repeat with this earth shattering illusion of permanence.
Just think about it, the daughters of the universe always flaring up, caving in and going out. But from here, from the top of my parents apartment I can pretend. I can pretend that lives last. That suffering exists not. That gods and goddesses come and go just like mortals do
Ignite, flash, and fade.
I can pretend that my truth is what matters, that magic exists and suffering exists not.
The truth behind stars is not the illusion of permanence and lightness and awe it grants me in those fifty minutes of rooftop existence. It's the power and energy it provides me to carry out my days until the next time we meet again.
That does not mean to pretend that the existence of something is, means in reality it exists not.
For one, magic exists and no one can and should doubt it.
For when there are rainbows and wildflowers, caterpillars transforming to creatures with patterned wings, the music of the heavy rain and the silence of the night sky who can doubt the magic that holds every thread on this planet together?
Anyone who has ever smiled, dreamt, felt, loved, laughed has been touched by this magic
and i know that this is the truth!
The stars only remind me of this through their own illusion of permanence. They remind me I'm not alone, that I'm always being watched.
North star and company...
Do you gaze back at me as I gaze at you?
Do you shed the same tears I shed for the beauty that beholds you?How many of you ancient fires were the last breath of sun to a collection of planets?
If all were to die out and collapse, how long until we realize how alone we are?
How long until we realize oh daughters of the universe that the cosmos is within us, within all of us.
For I believe when come to understand this equality, love will conquer all
and peace will not be an illusion
but true permanence.
