Dear Dad.
I’ve never learnt to like you .
Like a kid who took Commerce and
Found herself doing a Physics course.
And pain physically courses through my veins
Cause you and I have no chemistry.
And there’s no science behind
Your lack of affection
It affects me .
Dad, I’ve never learnt to like you .
Dear Dad.
You’ve been around my whole life and
All we’ve ever played is hide and seek .
Like it’s some kind of sick game and
I’m tired of being the seeker.
See I’m still trying to find you
Cause you’re so absent in your presence.
Counting up to my age to remind myself that
Each year , I still seek .
As if I wasn’t the one who was
Lost .
As if I wasn’t the one who was
Hiding.
Dear Dad.
I am in pain.
It’s as though you’ve cut me off and it
Literally cuts me deeply .
Like you’re the blood that leaves my body
Whenever I’m hurting and you never ooze
Long to say goodbye.
Helplessly dripping.
Leaving emotional stains in the home you’ve
Left .
Until you dry up and demand to be
Cleaned up .
Dear Dad.
This is your daughter speaking .
And if I could make you understand I wouldn’t
Be attempting again.
I’d do a live show with you alone as the
Audience.
And I’d hope you clap so loud that your
Essence would echo .
So the vibrations would be enough to
Silence my sorrow.
Dear Dad.
I’m not your biggest fan .
But I think love you .
And I hope you do too .