she's gorgeous
that's all i seem to know

and when your eyes start to glaze over
i can't, i need
to look away
you complain to me, whisper in slow syllables,
"this is how it's supposed to be"
my stomach in knots and my hands twisted
i can't, i need
to become her
(suddenly i regret the way my smile curves,
i regret the shape of my body against hers)
and to look at her pursed lips
makes me sick
to think
back onto your thoughts

...rewinding
and i don't care how long it takes
for me to

leave
forget,
leave
forget,

a sick cycle,
a circle that spins,
and i become the center
twirling again,
and again,
over her and what wasn't said