I've overextended
I've expected too much
I live on this tightrope to the stars
Forgetting how far I just might fall

I look at me over the past few months and all I see is
Normal
Makes it almost enough to forget
Makes it seem like my head isn't combustible
Makes it easy to act too much like the person I could be
If I didn't have
This
****
Head

Slowly, I was falling out of love with normal
But then I realized I was just falling
Toeing too close to the edge of the rope
Stumbling back unto the synapses that laugh at my reach
Tripping back towards the chemicals that break my heart
Toppling that fantasy of normal and remembering I'm not

Every so often I look at the earth below and think
What kind of human would I be without my head?
I'd make more sense decapitated
But instead I'm starry, strange me
But instead I'm alien

Luckily, I'm too familiar with these mistakes to fall all the way
My safety nets were already in place
I find my feet by the Moon
Instead of on the earth, dead

I'm laying in these heavy webs, watching space float by
I'm forced to look inside and remember that
In between my sparks of humanity
And my grass-stained toes
There is the dark void of space and the burning core of planets
There is the stars in my eyes and the lack of gravity
Despite my human smiles and my human face
I'm more star-child than anything earthly

In this weightless winter, blacker than night, I remember
I may find friends
I may find ground
I may find the meaning of human life
But underneath it all, I am an other, an oddity
A woman of stars and space
An asteroid, a moon, a star, given sentience and a body
Not quite wrong but not quite right
And never normal

My arms crawl heavily back onto my tightrope
My core weighed by the reminder of my abnormality
My brilliance
My madness
My feet balance just right, like stepping through stars is instinctive
My place is here, between the earth and the universe


I don't belong quite on earth
I don't belong quite in space
I live a life of paradox and pain
I live to never forget the galaxy in me
But sometimes I do forget
And the stars are swift to remind that
I am not human
I am not normal
I am beautifully, painfully, brilliantly, madly me

The price for the stars is one I'll gladly pay
However
The price is one I'd never ask another to suffer

I am a star-child and
I am the only one of my kind and
That's exactly how it should be