When asked to describe myself, I only give internal details.
" Oh, I'm nice, friendly, thoughtful.."
in fear of revealing how I truly feel
So when the question is proposed, my hands get sweaty.
My thoughts rush all over, words hanging on my tongue, but never long enough to formulate a statement.
To say I'm pretty is a lie in my eyes, for my opinion on myself differs from day to day.
I try to sound humble and somewhat confident when I say, "I'm pretty, I guess. I have nice hair."
Immediately, failed the confidence test, but they can't know the truth.
Not how I cried myself to sleep way too many times in a week.
Not how I held myself and tried to stop my body's shaking as the tears rolled my face.
Not how I looked in the mirror and was terrified of my own reflection.
They just can't.
I must keep up the image. The mask can't fall or slip now.
I hope no one can see the string. -nijah v