"Will I ever love again?" I can't help but wonder to myself. Thoughts of missing you come in waves, This is a special kind of hell. I try to continue living life. I see him, I approach him. We date, and he falls for me. I find him sweet, we build a connection. But I am numb. Things get intimate. That's when the nightmares begin. Like clockwork. I toss and turn with thoughts of you in my head. He doesn't kiss quite like you do. He doesn't wink at me when he catches me staring. He doesn't give me the stomach flip. He touches me, he excites me, but it is not the same. Is it me, or is it him? I can no longer tell. His fingers softly graze my skin, But don't provoke the same response. He doesn't know every ****** expression I have. He can't see right through me like you did. I don't have the years of memories with him. He is laying next to me, holding me close just like you did. So why is it I close my eyes and all I can see is you......