Help me please I think I'm broken
and I know we've never spoken
but I could use some friendly banter
just to get me through the night

You see my friend I'm lost and jaded
and my notions have since faded
leaving me the soulless vermin
that you see before your eyes

So feed me scraps and friendly laughter
and from now till ever after
I will be your humble servant
and your will, will be my own

I do not need so much attention
and I feel your apprehension
But I'll provide much satisfaction
with a bit of loving and a bone