Clutching the teddy bear you gave me,
scrolling through the feed of pictures we shared,
I stop at the video I took of you-
the one where you play your video game,
the one you love, while I laugh at your pretend frustration,
which you orchestrate for my entertainment.
I stop at the picture of young you-
wearing red, holding hands with Santa, looking at his hat-
we joked that our kid would look like that.
Clutching the teddy bear you gave me,
my heart breaks again,
hearing our song on repeat.