nineteen candles on her birthday cake
and she hides the scars, all her mistakes
and the way the knife felt, hidden in hand
she knew that no one would understand
so she carried her secret, heavy and thick
and she knew what it was like to feel sick
the sadness brought her to her knees
black and cold, lost in this disease
her mind hurts, her heart feels dead
she feels so lost inside her head
and there's relief, sweet and fast
if only she could make it last
but with each cut she goes deep
all she wants to do is sleep
and forget she was never enough