This morning a tough cookie showed up
I bit down
Treating it like all the others
It was harder than what vision enticed me to believe
Unchewable
I examined the edges
None
No angles, no cracks, no oozing treacle
No dreamy aftertaste
Just outer candy
Just yesterday's choices, hitting me today
Reality
And a pool of more of the same to tread water in
Forever
I want meaning
I want the dream
Before the too tired to care years
Blanket me in wrinkles
Someone: Meaning is sweat
The guru: Meaning is endurance
Me: Meaning is unavoidable
If you caress the pain
That comes along with it
Sweat uncovers joy
And joy brings meaning
The boy is not meaning
He is a figment past
He is real. But he is past
Keep him there
The girl is real.
She could be meaning
But she is a figment future
Leave her there
Like dancing dandelions on a late summer breeze
Aching to get home
Forgetting they left the attachment to ground
Years ago
The candy coated in a message
The message: Stay right where you are
What is...is more than I already have
My life...is the meaning
Treasure found
It was never lost (what was I thinking)
Yes... I've wasted my passion on a lost Buddha
Many times
Yes...I still backwash my pool on a sunny day craving more
But its meaning
Its NOW
And a call to rise above