fidgeting with whatever you can
'till you just resort to tearing at your cuticles
until they bleed
and no matter how hard you try,
you just can’t stop,
you think it’s fine now,
but your fingers will be wrapped in band-aids
before you know it
it's a painful heartbeat pounding against your chest
as you rehearse in your head every word that you want to say
but when it comes time for you to speak,
you cannot breathe
it's the sound of the crying babe in the theatre
as you stand on stage with all eyes on you
blinded by lights
and expectations
it’s being trapped in a tight space,
surrounded by skyscrapers and voices
and when you look up, you can’t see the stars
it's trembling legs like a newborn deer
it’s the tightness in your chest
after sending a risky text
it’s talking to someone and looking anywhere but their face
it's mindless noise
drowning out everything that you need to hear