each and every day
is a little easier

182 days of
deep breaths
and adventures
and pain
and healing

its the little things
you know?

remembering the words you said
the anger you caused
the way you treated me.

the way i felt:
drowning in undying love
for a person who would never
love me back.

the way i felt:
drowning in anger
at myself
for my stupidity
for my helplessness

the way i worked:
the itty bitty steps towards
fullness

the realization that I deserve something better.

i still worry i meant nothing to you.
that everything was all a lie

that all our love was just the fog,
disorienting and fleeting.

but

i am every piece of every moment
before you
with you
and now after.

i am everything and anything
and i feel and i feel and i feel.

i am all the little things.
i am not nothing.