It was almost two months ago
yet it seems like it could've happened
just last night.
With tired eyes
I had spent a sleepless night
with my ear glued to my phone.
My best friend,
the one I loved the most,
was on the other end.
Crying.
He was crying
and telling me
he was planning to **** himself,
for real this time,
and it was all my fault.
My eyes were red and bloodshot.
They were puffy and swollen.
As he cried
he spoke words I'll never forget.
He said to me,
"You could've helped."
"You could've saved me."
I told him I loved him
in the ballpark of a million times.
Not one of them had a response.
Don't worry,
everything turned out okay.
He's alive and well.
Not well,
but alive.