our hearts were beating
in sync with the noise that drowned our fears.
you spun me around and
though we were screaming at the top
of our lungs, i couldn’t hear a sound.
your hazel eyes looked into mine
and i
realized
that you are beautiful;
however,
you were not mine.

i don’t know if
i was trying to replace her
but i missed the feeling of flying
and i couldn’t wait any later.
no matter how hard i
tried to stifle my cries
of being with her again
i knew i could not testify
to the fact
that i love her and she may still be mine.

she may.
may not.
but i know that she still occupies my thoughts.
i am not done, i cannot run
from this stupid ******* thing called love.

i love her.
i…love her.
i love…her.

so i apologize for looking
into your eyes that night
and making you believe
that i’m yours and you’re mine.
the stars felt misaligned and i
was dissatisfied, verified,
because
though you are beautiful,
you are not mine.