dear daysleeper,
hello September 3rd. i am apprehensive, i am disappointed.and im honestly sad. not because of you but because of how i feel. it comes in waves. the reminders of this day. maybe thats why i am sick today. to avoid seeing you and remembering.
so much wasted time, thinking.
never setting standards or making rules.
we just left didnt we?
not caring who saw or who got in the way.
nothing held us back..
except ourselves.
except me.
i was always afraid of heights.
you taught me that to learn to fly we needed to just jump..
from great heights,
and see where it goes.
no planning
no reason
other than to live.
but taking too many risks causes chaos.
to me, growing wings meant cutting my roots.
my deep, desperate, roots.
but you held me tight.
and there was trust.
then the rain came down.
we were so free.
flying high in dreams.
of monsters.
and sun.
we were so free.
yet we never left the neighborhood.
i always found a way there.
whether it be running my *** off or taking the bike.
i always found your heart.
i just never really opened it.
this …lock.
a lock of the welcoming past.
that smothered you.
that took too long.
too long for me to handle.
“your desire”.
what a joke.
talking and texting.
the addiction to your words.
killed me.
i was so convinced.
i am convinced.
that you love me.
are you done?
what the hell is going on?
the dust has only just begun to fall..
the day before christmas-Andrew Isaac Gomez.