Today was one of the most painful days of my life
Next to the day the boy with the birthmark on his right lower calf kissed my cheek outside school
When you talked to me
I thought I was seeing things
I couldn't breath all over again
I had to fight back tears for the life of me
But I was happy, even though I didn't say a word
I know I was because I started shaking all over again
Even though you were smiling
Inside I was screaming

With joy because you remembered me -- even for two minutes
And with anger
But mostly with pain


And today was one of the most painful days of my life
Next to the day the boy with hazel eyes told me he'd be here for me
And then he picked sides
And I guarantee you
He didn't pick me
Just like you


When I saw you sitting and waiting
I couldn't bring myself to look you in the eyes
Because I knew I would cry
and I did cry
I do that a lot
You're probably sick of it as it is
So I spared you the rain
I spared you the thunderstorm that is me
And today was one of the most painful days of my life
Next to the day the boy with cold hands told me he didn't understand why he was so ******* special

I don't know if you'll keep the gifts I gave you
I just needed them to stop reminding me your gone
I didn't want to burn them
Or throw them out like trash
I hope that says something good about me
Something--
If not anything, about me
About the way I love people
People who leave
People who stay
People who make broken promises
And about the way I listen
About the way I give
                              
                                        and give
                                                                 and give
Those are some things I hope to god that gesture says about me
Even if you don't see it
Even if it seems stupid
I hope that was lighting
And today was one of the most painful days of my life
Next to the day the boy with a five star smile told me he could get lost in my eyes
Right next to the day you told me I took your breath away
Right next to the day
Right next to that day
  (v.m)