The thoughts in my head are indescribable

They take me to places I don't know or recognize

But they also lead me to destinations that I've been before

Memories in my subconscious that I would rather forget

Memories in my subconscious that I get frustrated that I forget

My mind tells me many things that I don't speak out loud

Sometimes it tells me that death is the only way for me

Other times it tells me that hope is the only thing I need

Other times it tells me to not use it so much

Some more times it tells me that I don't use it enough

My mind is my enemy and my friend

My comforter and disrupter

My antagonist and protagonist

The beginning and the end of my being

I feel like I can't control it but maybe that's the problem

Maybe I have to just let it be

The only fear I have in this philosophy is that I may go crazy

But maybe I'm already at that point