See, a lot of people I know love to be out and about.
They love to live life by going to work, getting off, spending time with loved ones, drinking a beer or two, coming home, kicking off their shoes, heading off to sleep, and then waking back up in the morning to do it all again.
Well, not me.
Leaving my bed is a struggle, so work is difficult to maintain, and when I finish whats mandatory for me, I usually just end up going to relax again. Being out with my family exhausts me, and alcohol only dazes my senses, so, it's sort of a waste for me. I'd rather just lay back down and rest. Rest and rest without doing anything, like I've worked myself too
much and need respite from the stress.
I'm relaxing with no real reason, I suppose.
At least, that's what it looks like.
See, I stress a lot. My mind is like a gym inside a cage inside my heart, my blood races out of it, controlling my legs and my arms, forcing me to get up is like running a hundred yards. And while my mind is confined, my body sits and lies, resting idly while my mind sits in wait of a reason to stand again. I suppose it sees no reason to stand on it's own unless mandatory. In general terms, I mean.
And on the few times I'm not asleep, I sit in silent thought as my mind wanders in itself clouded with the fog of it's own thoughts, like my thoughts cloud themselves by being themselves. Maybe it's just easier to  not think at all and put my brain on the shelf, leave it at home while I head out for the day.
No, I can't take my brain out of my heart and my cage, my mind is locked far away in myself. Feels like it's always been that way, even though I remember the days when I wasn't all locked away. I guess the days seem longer when they aren't so far away. And when I say far away, I mean unreachable yet visible, like I'm stargazing in the middle of the day.
Gazing at the distant memories that were lost to the time that I wasted away laying in bed not wanting to be awake.
I'm just lazy though.