I am scared;
constantly
scared that I will see him
walking into the grocery store
going out to eat
shopping at the mall
that I will turn around and see him
and the only thing worse than being scared of seeing him is not seeing him
not getting an apology
not getting to scream
not even getting to stand in front of him utterly terrified
but having to think of how he is moving on with his life
new school
new people
a whole new start
how I am stuck sitting here writing about him
how I can’t move on
how I am stuck
stuck here
writing to you