They say the most recent pain is the one that hurts the longest
And ******* hurt like a hammer to the heart
You hurt like my throat burning raw after crying for hours
You hurt like all the empty morning hours I spend crying now
You hurt like no tomorrow even though I’ll love you forever
And they said the most recent pain is the one that hurts the longest
But how come it feels like it will never stop
Because I know **** well in a year
When I find pictures of you buried beneath boxes my heart will still skip a beat
Someone in my math class has the same name as you
And when I heard your name called god I felt nervous all over again even though I knew it wasn’t you
What the **** do you think that felt like
I could tell you
But you probably won’t get it
Because unlike you
I wasn’t cold about my feelings
I didn’t push you away when I needed you most
And I’m not the one who left
Those are all things you did
And I am not you
I put my heart on a platter and gave it to you
I remember your favorite color being red
I’ll always remember
And I’ll remember your family,
And I’ll remember that your colorblind and how much you love donuts
I’ll remember the look in your eyes the night you told me you’d try
And I’ll remember the first song that ever played while we made love that first time
I’ll remember vanilla hair gel, and 5 am conversations
I won’t forget you, ever
Please don’t forget me


(v.m)