I have loved you for a long time
And hated myself
For you not loving me
The scorn of being
The unrequited lover
Burnt into my skin.
But you are my best friend
With you I have laughed
So much that I've cried
And cried myself to sleep
Thinking about why
I am the undesirable
The unlovable, the always
And yet never quite.
At night you are
The man of my dreams
And in the day
Perfect and somehow godlike
Bathed in sunlight and self-confidence
While I dim in the shadows behind you.
But I cannot hate myself anymore
And I cannot love you anymore
So I must turn my back on sunshine
And let myself enjoy the rainbows
And the rainstorms.