Jan 2018
To A,
I won’t be there for you anymore when you are bored, when you have no more girls to landi with. No more sweet messages. You won’t hear my happy and raspy voice again when you try to talk to me because i bet it wont be happy. I won’t beg you anymore to listen to what am I saying because it is so boring for you, i wont even beg you to stay . You will never hear me laugh at your corny jokes. Yes, I won’t be there for you anymore, but i guess i'll just love you from a distance.
Just so you know, it is so hard for me to do this. I’ve spent many nights overthinking on how to stop thinking about you. I’ve shed bucket of tears everytime you made me feel so disliked. I wrote lots of songs about and for you, but sometimes it brought me ABSOLUTELY NO WORDS because the pain was just too strong IT NO LONGER ALLOWED MY BRAIN to function the way it was, cause you clouded my thoughts with the thought of you. But I want you to know that it ends here. No more overthinking. No more tears every night. And for my future songs, they will no longer be about you, sad to say, I’m letting my feelings go because it is slowly killing my soul. I’m losing my happiness that is used to put the life in me, but suddenly you killed it.
Thank you for making me realize that I deserve better. Thank you for making me question my self-worth, I am working on it. Thank you for letting me enter your life even if it is just the outermost layer while I’ve let you touch my core. Thank you because you made me realize also how my best friend felt when Clyde hurt her, but at least Clyde was a gentleman and a man enough to come back and love her and actually he never stopped.
For the last time, I want to say sorry. Sorry for being so clingy and needy. Sorry if I assumed that you like talking to me everytime that’s why I called you every chance I’ve got. Sorry if I’ve fell to deep in this pool of emotion when all you’ve wanted is to chill and just enjoy the heat of the sun. I am so sorry. I am sorry i made you do things you were not comfortable in doing pala, lalo na make tambay in coffee shops and just laugh and make kwento.
Someday, I know someone will enter my life and loves being in it. Someone will enjoy listening to my stories about what happened with me and my best friend and what happened at home, or simply a funny thing that i just thought about. Someone will call me just to know how is my day going and will cheer me up if it is not so well. Someone will text me good morning and good night with a smiley. Someone will appreciate me...
and for the next girl that you will love, i hope you will take her to the moon for me, just like how you promised me (hello Moira) i also hope you be good to her, and how I've always dreamt of how you would be.
letting you go
I won’t be there for you anymore when you are bored, when you have no more girls to landi with. No more sweet messages. You won’t hear my happy and raspy voice again when you try to talk to me because i bet it wont be happy. I won’t beg you anymore to listen to what am I saying because it is so boring for you, i wont even beg you to stay . You will never hear me laugh at your corny jokes. Yes, I won’t be there for you anymore, but i guess i'll just love you from a distance.
Just so you know, it is so hard for me to do this. I’ve spent many nights overthinking on how to stop thinking about you. I’ve shed bucket of tears everytime you made me feel so disliked. I wrote lots of songs about and for you, but sometimes it brought me ABSOLUTELY NO WORDS because the pain was just too strong IT NO LONGER ALLOWED MY BRAIN to function the way it was, cause you clouded my thoughts with the thought of you. But I want you to know that it ends here. No more overthinking. No more tears every night. And for my future songs, they will no longer be about you, sad to say, I’m letting my feelings go because it is slowly killing my soul. I’m losing my happiness that is used to put the life in me, but suddenly you killed it.
Thank you for making me realize that I deserve better. Thank you for making me question my self-worth, I am working on it. Thank you for letting me enter your life even if it is just the outermost layer while I’ve let you touch my core. Thank you because you made me realize also how my best friend felt when Clyde hurt her, but at least Clyde was a gentleman and a man enough to come back and love her and actually he never stopped.
For the last time, I want to say sorry. Sorry for being so clingy and needy. Sorry if I assumed that you like talking to me everytime that’s why I called you every chance I’ve got. Sorry if I’ve fell to deep in this pool of emotion when all you’ve wanted is to chill and just enjoy the heat of the sun. I am so sorry. I am sorry i made you do things you were not comfortable in doing pala, lalo na make tambay in coffee shops and just laugh and make kwento.
Someday, I know someone will enter my life and loves being in it. Someone will enjoy listening to my stories about what happened with me and my best friend and what happened at home, or simply a funny thing that i just thought about. Someone will call me just to know how is my day going and will cheer me up if it is not so well. Someone will text me good morning and good night with a smiley. Someone will appreciate me...
and for the next girl that you will love, i hope you will take her to the moon for me, just like how you promised me (hello Moira) i also hope you be good to her, and how I've always dreamt of how you would be.
letting you go
