I watch Laura through our adjoining office window
and pray to any god that will listen that she won't pick up the receiver.

I hope my glare burns the cord that...
******.

  Good morning, Mr. Prater.  My names is Laura and I'm calling from Vector Supplies.
    How are you doing today?

Her screech of a voice causes the hair on my arms to stand up.
Her laugh should be one of the layers of hell.

  Hello?  Mr. Prater?

Another customer dropped the call.
If someone with that voice called my home I would demand the manager
and accuse the caller of huffing helium, trying to get high.

She's the worst salesperson in this office.
Frankly, no one is great here.
At least we're better than the northern branch.

The boss, Mr. Leckman, opens the door and slithers into her office.

  Laura, I saw that another customer hung up.

  I'm sorry, Mr. Leckman.  I promise I'm trying.

  Try being more perky like I know you can.

Oh ****.  Don't encourage her you *****.

  And Laura, you can call me Ted, remember?

  Yes, Mr. Leckman.  I mean Ted.

Her giggle almost broke the glass of our window,
and if it had, I would have slit my wrists with the shards.
No hesitation.

I'm still watching the horror show,
and that's when I saw it:

He winked.

That *****.  I knew she was ******* him.
That's the only reason why she's still here.

Sadly, I was interrupted mid-strangle fantasy when Mr. Leckman,
or Ted, barged in.

  Ms. Dunn, get back to work.

  Sorry, Ted--uh, Mr. Leckman.

He had shut the door before I could correct myself.
Great.  I'm sure I'll get fired by the end of this week.
I need this ****-up of a job.  
It's one of the few places that doesn't make you
**** in a cup before you sell your soul.

Maybe I should bend over more often.