In some light
you were grey.
The mellow cast wrecks
what I've forgiven.
I loved you, I love you.
There are no birds, no half-
mouthed cliches, how?
I've died and I've died without
hatred, apathy.

In the morning
I kissed your cheeks and I loved you,
I love you.  I open my hands and there
is only air.
I've swallowed my own yellow, my
own bouquet of mental *******
dressed all in pillowcases grey
wishing you'd lay over me, skin over skin
and whisper
I love you, I love you
into the shallow curves of my neck and ears.