Where do I put all this pain?
Is there a box made of steel
Where I can lock away all the hurt I feel?
How about a vault?
Or some kind of hidden chest?
Where I can throw away all my feelings
Except the best
I squirm with anger
Out of all control
Why do I let you do this to me?
A stallion to his foal
Would never kick with such force-
Leave a mark like this, a permanent bruise.
It’s been five years
And now you want to change?
Too little too late,
But you expect me to jump on board
Your sinking ship
With no hesitation,
Well, that I just can’t afford.
Because I’ve played that game
And lost over and over again.
There’s nothing left of me to lose this time-
My life is just on the mend;
I can’t weather another break in my sail,
Or my ship will go down
Right along with yours.
That’s what I fear most, more than “if I fail”.
You would like that though, wouldn’t you?
A companion to pull you all the way through
To the dark side--
Someone to blame
For all your mistakes
And for your downfall too.
I plead you to stop,
To just leave me out,
To take my feelings into consideration for once.
Instead, you strike repeatedly, causing blunt
Force trauma straight to my brain.
All this round-about
Is making me insane.
Too many forced rides
On this ferris wheel of terror,
Take me round and round,
Rock the carriage.
I beg for an escape,
But you always want more
Than I can take.
You come and go as you please
And you want my heart’s door to be wide open
Whenever you decide to return with ease?
Well honey it aint that easy-
Your turn to feel the burn,
The burn of being left
Alone
To fight life on your own.
Pretend like you don’t know the pain you made.
Go ahead, tell me it’s not a mistake.
“Could’ve should’ve would’ve”.
I’ve had all I can take.
Just let me be.
Can’t you see?
You’ve caused more than enough misery.
I can’t fight you anymore.
My knuckles, they’re getting too sore.
Forget about my heart-- it’s on the floor.
You want to play these emotional games,
But I’m through.
God didn’t know what He did to me
When he gave me to you.
Go on, live your life,
And I’ll live mine.
I’ve told you this already once before-
I mean it this time...
Goodbye.
Clearly written in the same era as my "The Truth, Daddy Dearest"