I saw you today but I must not dwell and not
get drawn in again by your enthusiasm for me
that lasts only as long as I become interested and then
disappears

You are a mirage, a man I see and can only wonder about
and now you sense my distance--how hard I've worked
for this distance--how much therapy meditation hypnosis
and now there you sit coyly beckoning that if I
answer it will disappear like a mirage

It is not real
You are not an oasis in the desert
You are a fantasy rising from the wavy heat of
my worry and anxiety and sadness
which blurs my vision and makes me vulnerable to
your sweet little smile and sidelong glances
and the feeling that you'd like for me to
flirt again and feel excited to see you every day
only to be avoided as I reach out
I can't go back
I must not go back