That moment I felt like I couldn't breathe.
Everything I felt and thought left me.
My mind and soul, suffocating.
The very minute the phone started ringing.

Just a blink in my eye, you had vanished.
The desperation I felt, couldn't stand it.
Never know how the hell I will manage.
No mending this depth of damage.

It's been unstable for me since you been gone.
No matter how many drugs that I been on.
None of them ever numbed this pain.
It's just to strong.
Wish I could have said my 'So long'.

I'm sorry if I failed you now.
Things have been rough since you ain't around.
The songs I heard no longer make a sound.
Never thought I'd hit the ground,
rock bottom,
I was meant for space bound.

I wonder this Earth now so lonely.
Feeling a lot like I'm the only,
one who understands or even cares,
to even know me.
I wear this heavy burden.
Smile while I'm hurting.
Act as though I can manage,
then cry as my back is turning.

Maybe I should seek some therapy.
In a nut house is where I'd be.
You see.
I'm ashamed to be grieving.
In fear of letting down your legacy.
All the 'sympathetic' 'love' I would be getting.
Would set me off,
end up in house fires,
I'd probably be setting.

I know you wouldn't be to shocked at this.
If it was your's that is missed,,
you'd feel this twist.
When your heart doesn't just break it shatters.
Into a thousand micro pieces,
then like that, black confetti,

Your emotionally scattered.

Battered, tattered, feeling like the mad hatter.
And as time goes on,
I become madder and madder.
Wishing I could go back in time,
just to hear your laughter.

It fades like a record,
from the good old days,
scratchy, and warped,
the more I try to make it play.
I know it will never sound the same.

Wish you could see how far I've came.