what am i doing playing pretend waiting out life going through all the motions but not very well i feel like i'm dying but i know that i haven't begun living yet i am scared life is a monster all it wants to do is **** me from behind put teeth in my shoulder rip out my hair make a ***** out of me i used to be senseless i used to not question every little thing i miss that but i could never go back enlightenment hate it but can't live without it