I'm still at the point where I pretend you don't exist.
every time you come up it drags me down deeper.
I want to leave, I can't handle this.
I always think that maybe this time you'll come back.
days, weeks, months, nothing.
I always thought we would be forever
even if we weren't together you would still be here.
but I guess everything I wanted to say was never said.
there will always be that part of me that will remember it,
remember how big of a coward I actually was
because I could never tell you the truth,
I was scared of losing you
but I pushed you away even further.
i'm sorry.