By now, I've got a swimsuit printed on my body
So you can see I'm not being too naughty
Or  even maybe going to a fake tanning booth
I don't have the patience for that, that's the truth

Bad knees and back lead me to the pool
Even though it bores me, like sitting on a stool
In a bar where I'm really not feeling it,
Even though there's nothing wrong with the place where I sit
It's just the company, I look around, they're not my type
And yeah, I love to drink but I want to call it a night

I bought a book about different strokes
And the pictures and diagrams, showed all different folks

The time passed by a little less fierce
And when I got out, people looked at me like I was all kool and pierced
A lady told me I swim well, did I learn in school?
And it's weird I just read a book, and jumped in the pool