coffee and cigarettes
my daily analgesic
something to numb the pain
and get me through the day

but it's so much more than that or this
because with each sip or nicotine-laced hit
i am enveloped by waves of nostalgia
and taken back to better days
before depression hit me like a freight train and afflicted me with mental paraplegia

these two simple man-made things
remind me of so many good times in my life
like listening to jimmy eat world with my sister
or a morning ritual held in esteem with my "wife"
a late night relaxation on a back porch with family
or a distraction for me from the business end of a knife

for my turbulent soul
so often in need of soothing
nothing is more peaceful than the smooth roll
of paper-wrapped tobacco between my fingers
and the bittersweet taste of coffee lingering smoothly
as caffeine and nicotine
mix in my bloodstream
and i am finally home