When i picture us together
    I imagine a tug-of-war and loud ripping noises
    constant ripping noises
    nauseating ripping noises
    tendons and bones and muscle pried apart
    It’s a sick self-reliance that flows through my veins
    not blood
    and it keeps me glued together
    NO
    NOT GLUED
    it’s cement and I’m stuck stuck stuck and I am so sorry
    if I let you pry me apart
    apart from I Don’t Know What
    then I’ll crack into a million gray pieces of stone
    You’re the tendons ripping
    the bones tearing
    the nausea and the pouring ripping disgusting noises
    And when I tear you apart
    you won’t be in pieces of red muscle and fragments of bones
    I’ll tear you in two and thousands upon thousands of glass beads will crash to the floor and scatter into the grass and you will never ever get them back
    and that is why it will never work.