the facade that i'm a cheery, happy squirrel
is tired
i carefully began to build myself a persona the day i knew i wasn't okay
i took the energy from my rare manic episodes and made it a habit to try and always be that way
my facade portrayed me as always positive, always happy
"i love life! i love myself! wow!"
the frantic energy i could muster up
confused my thoughts even more
in trying to keep up the positivity,
nothing else made sense to me
i have to concentrate twice as hard or else it will all fall apart

well decades later the facade is becoming transparent
or maybe i'm just exhausted
i'm not this cheery, happy squirrel
i actually wish everyday i was dead
now i need a pill to give me half the energy  i need to
be okay