i walk a line some where between listening to myself and listening to God... if i truly believed i'd burn in hell i suppose i wouldn't smoke that chronic i bought and if i truly believed i'd burn in hell i'd probably do my homework, stop saying "****"and make sure to not flirt with men that weren't mine picture this weekend scene; saturday night, basement drink in hand smoke inhaled as clean and clear as everyday air i would tell that nice boy with the lip ring and name that starts with a "b"that i was taken by a special man and ... and..excuses.... let them go let them roll as smooth as bacardi straight from the handle bought at the local CVS by a bought-off *** i guess i'm a girl that believes in hell on a bad day when all bad things poverty, homelessness, grandma's cancer and stubbing your toe comes in the form of your dorm roommate drunk at two am hollering and arranging the mini fridge, when all the bad things feel as though they affect you directly and if i truly believed i'd burn in hell i'd be the girl that appreciated that remembers there's a merciful God twenty-four seven always but realitywho forgets that life is a mystery i write and it flows and i know that these words are exaggerated because my conscious knows i never miss a lecture, and is faithful to the one beautiful boythat actually gives a **** the day after i'm the girlthat smokes a bowl and worries about her soul picture this weekend scene: alone with a man gorgeous and caring as could ever be frozen lake front wrapped in his arms, perfect any teen girl couldn't want anything more but unhappiness rests in me it rests in his arms, sure neglected for a day or two but this girls knows clearity in mind strength through living empirically and if i truly believe'd i'd go to heaven i'd stop letting my worries write these ****** *** poems