Dear whoever,

I choose to walk in the deepest darkest recesses of the night. Just as the midnight hour passes. I wander campus alone, lost and confused, letting my feet take me on the same path it does every night. A path where most people would never venture. I head towards the darkest alleyways, the most deserted parking lots, the places where people can be hurt, have been hurt, and will be hurt.

I am searching for that evil that once hurt me. I want to see it again, confront it. I want it to devour the little bit it spit out the last time it descended upon me. What little it has left within me is not worthy of living. This creature of the night that prowls on those who do not notice has taken my self dignity, my beauty, my innocence. Has profited on my naivety that all is good in the world.

My mind is ****** up. I am *****, beyond *****, I am polluted. Polluted with filth and grime and bits of someone who thrives on being the powerful over the powerless. My soul is unclean and forever tainted. maybe one day this will just be a back file of my memories, but it will always be there. Haunting my days and terrifying my nights.

So on these midnight escapades, I offer myself, wholeheartedly to the beast that stole me. I offer my body, my mind, my sanity, my soul. Either I am taken away, to forever dwell in the fires of Hell, or I fight and survive and know that I can protect myself once again. I need to find out. That is why I am offering myself. I need to know my blood still runs through my body with life. Some people wish they were dead, I just wish I felt alive once more.

Most sincerely,
Me