What do you do when the happiness drains?
When the one who you have reluctantly given your
heart suddenly changes every mannerism?
When "cute" turns into annoyance?
One little mistake made a world of difference.
I didn't lie, I didn't cheat, I was scared.
For my fear I get reprimanded.
Now I feel alone, I feel as though he doesn't want
to speak to me.
Every day used to be full of conversation, now
it seems I have to struggle for simple small talk.
I want nothing more for it to be back to normal.
I feel alone and sad, falling into a dark hole
I promised I wouldn't never go into again.
Maybe I was a mistake. Maybe I should have never
asked that favor, or at least opened my big mouth.
But what happened, did in fact happen, and there
is no changing what happened in the past.
Besides, it was the happiest I think I ever been.
He seemed to truly care, it was a wonderful feeling.
He opened up to me right away, I love it.
But I had been hurt in the past, and was scared to do the same.
I shared more then I thought I would be comfortable with.
He told me of a mistake he made, it was morally wrong.
And I wanted to run away, but I forgave him for it.
It really seemed to hurt him. It was against all I
thought was right, but I was falling for him.
After surrendering my heart, I made a mistake.
Yes, I should have told him sooner, but
we seemed to be on edge, I didn't want to lose him.
I didn't want to hurt him, but it was too late.
I hurt him, the worst part was I couldn't really
see how badly I hurt him.
He seemed cold, and distant, but he still went
through all the motions.
I started feeling the cold shoulder, it hurt.
I felt broken and lonely, lost.
I had to fix it.
I didn't know how, I told him every detail I could.
Nothing.
Everyday all I can thing of is "How do I fix it?"
I don't know what to do, but I am hurting.
I feel empty.
I want everything to go back to normal.
I forgave his mistake, why can't he forgive mine.