Wherever we went
Something followed.
Something twisted and hollow and bleeding from the mouth.
It lingered in the attic we stayed that sticky summer
And it rested alongside your mahogany canopy bed
Exhaling its rotting stench of doubt and fear
In a cold room of sickly green walls
And crimson carpet.

I could hear it moving downstairs as muffled voices
Cast angry pitches at the marble floor
Sliding off the surface and crashing into crystal heirlooms.

It dragged its claws behind us
Through the autumn leaves as we walked in silence
Letting the sun warm the parts our words could not.

And somehow it cast its reflection
Onto that sky
Thrown up over the dark tossing waves
Where a rainbow collided with the sunset
Flooding colors and light and shadow
Somewhere halfway to heaven but sinking slowly into hell.

I could feel it there -
A lump rising in my throat as I realized we were never meant to see behind the curtain
But someone forgot to close it all the way
And for a moment that defied time and space
We were brought to the edge
And had to guide ourselves back blinded
But breathing the earth deeper than ever.  

I know you felt it there too
Which is why when I saw the post on Facebook
All I could think was -
What did you do.

I never asked how it happened
Because deep down I knew
You had been ready
To die.